False Pretenses
by SVUobsessor
Summary: She was at the base of her breakdown. Where her silence was turning into hysteria, and where she was dreading those thoughts that evolved into words. ***May or may not have only two chapters*** e/o
1. Base Breakdown

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

Author's Note: I'm back...with something ultra dramatic. I have a disclaimer though...and it's not that I stole the characters and they're not mine...but Olivia is sort of out of character but that is only because of the circumstances...so hang with me and please don't put that in the review...cause I know that I sucked on characterization at the end a little.

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

False Pretenses

Chapter One

Base Breakdown

The chrome barrel of a gun was delicately placed right at Olivia Benson's forehead. The person aiming the gun at her forehead was a middle-aged man with graying temples. He was gripping the gun as tight as he could. It was like his life depended on it, and in essence it did because his life would be so different if he surrendered.

It was a month ago they got the rape case that lead them to the man holding the gun. He had brutally raped a little girl and countless others in different states. Olivia's was the main detective on the case and she chased a lead all the way to a abandoned house that was just about falling down. Her suspect did a sneak attack with perfect timing. As Olivia rounded a corner he stepped out from behind a door when she spun around all she saw was the gun.

"What are you doing here?" The man asked.

His voice was much softer than Olivia had imagined it would be. He had a tough looking face and a soft voice. It was a horrible contrast that sent raw shivers down her spine.

"I wouldn't shoot her," said a voice.

Olivia wanted to look and see the blue eyes that were here to save her, but couldn't because there was a gun pointed at her. She didn't have to turn to know who was there.

The assailant was looking past her at Elliot.

"Who the hell are you?"

Olivia took this brief moment of him not focusing on her to take advantage of the situation. She looked to where her gun was pointed…it was his upper thigh. In a matter of five seconds she pulled the trigger, had a struggle for the gun, and came out on top.

She had his gun in one hand and was pointing her gun at him with the other.

"You know you're just not street smart enough to be a criminal," Olivia stated as Elliot pulled him off the ground.

- - - - -

Elliot shoved the assailant into the car with excessive force. Olivia watched him impressed that he was sticking up for her when he was probably mad at her for her stunt of going into the house alone. He slammed the door of his car, trapping the man inside.

Olivia wiped the grin off her face and posted a professional one on.

"His name is Tom Maucaula, his M.O. was mat…"

"Why the hell did you come here alone?" Elliot interupted

"We made it out didn't we?" Olivia answered his question with a question.

"Yeah, you were fortunate that I showed up." Elliot stated.

"It would have happened had you been there or not." Olivia stated.

"You need to be more careful; I can't lose you." He said as he turned around and opened the door to his Sudan, "Call Cragen."

- - - - -

Four words swirled around and around in Olivia's head. She was buzzing. It felt like a slew of energy was encompassing her brain. She had just went through a grueling hour of explaining the situation to Internal Affairs. They started up an investigation and now she was force to be in the squad room for a while instead of out in the field investigating.

"I can't lose you."

Those four words would keep bugging her until she did something about them. She knew that she'd hate herself if she never told him.

She was laying on her back face up to the fan that was slowly spinning and making her nauseous. She looked to the side to keep from throwing up. On the bedside table was a bottle of vodka. A small glass next to it was broken from when she hit the nightstand's corner a little to bluntly trying to set the glass down.

The next thing she laid eyes on was her home phone. It was standing up on it's console, comparable only to alcohol, because it was going to help her and hurt her at the same time.

She picked up the phone and dialed the number she knew so well. Elliot Stabler's cell phone number.

--

Elliot stood before Kathy who had her hair up because of the summer heat. She was wearing a tank top and short shorts. Elliot presumed it was because it was hot as hell in the house. She was explaining why she let the twins go with their friends on his weekend.

"The kids needed to get out of this sauna." Kathy explained, "I'm sorry I didn't call I was helping Todd with the broken air conditioner and we lost track of time. I figured you would be working late like always anyways."

"You could have had one of the kids call me or something, the drive from Queens to Manhattan is a little time consuming." He said as he heard his phone ring from inside his pocket.

He took the cell phone out of his work pants, opened it and looked at the screen before saying.

"Stabler,"

Olivia managed to get out a whiney sounding, "el…"

"Are you okay?" Elliot asked once again letting his feelings for her get the best of him. He held a finger up to show Kathy he would be done in a minute.

Kathy rolled her eyes and said, "Oh my god…it's Olivia, how typical."

"I need…to tell you…some…thing." Olivia said with a loud hiccup, that Elliot never expected from Olivia. Which gave her away….she was drunk.

He decided to humor her thinking she would pull a drunken practical joke. "Ok."

"I love you." Olivia stated so quickly that Elliot though he had imagined it.

"I…" he was about to say it back when he realized that Kathy was standing there listening to the whole conversation, "I…Liv…I gotta go."

All he heard was the phone line go dead…she had hung up.

--

A tear immediately ran it's course down her beautiful clear skin as she pressed the end button her phone. A vein of anger ran through her body as she gripped the phone and threw it as hard as she could at the wall across from her bed. She closed her eyes as the phone made blunt contact with the wall, two more tears slipping past her eyelids. She was at the base of her breakdown. Where her silence was turning into hysteria, and where she was dreading those thoughts that evolved into words. Elliot was now all knowing of her feelings…he had heard, yet hadn't responded in the way she had hoped. She cried out in a way that shook her whole upper body. She bent over wanting to clear those words from her head. I gotta go. "_Who says that after an I love you? A person who doesn't want to say it back" _ She thought.

Olivia felt a overwhelming need to cleanse herself of those words. She stood up and glanced over in the broken phone's direction. It was in two the inner parts of the phone hanging out of it's shell. Satisfied with her act of rage, she headed to the bathroom.

She turned on the bathtub…which had always been her safe haven. She knew after tonight she would somehow hate the same bathtub. It would bring memories of the words he never said.

Olivia saw her shaving razor so delicately laid on the side of the bathtub like it was fate. It was one of those cheap razors with few blades, a kind that would cut easily if pressed too hard. Her mind wandered about the possibility.

She wouldn't have to deal with the thought of him not loving her anymore. The memory would be gone. Her arm extended and her hand grabbed the razor…she felt like she was half dead already. She sunk into the water, hoping that she could somehow just spontaneously fall asleep.

Reviews...are extremely appreciated...plus they're my motivation to write more...and I have the ideas all ready so I promise you if you review this time I will update...eventually.


	2. His

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

Author's Note: I wrote this like an hour after I posted the first chapter. I hope you guys like it! I did better with characterization in this chapter. I think I'm going to make it into three chapters or more...depends on the reviews.

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

False Pretenses

Chapter 2

His

Elliot sat outside of Olivia's door, debating on whether or not he should use his key because she wouldn't answer. He had a good feeling she was in there, he had even thought to check her usual parking space, and her car was there. He had called her home phone three times, left a desperate message on her answering machine, and then tried her cell phone.

He had text, called, and left two voicemails on the way over. He needed badly to check on her. So he put the key in the lock and turned.

The door was quiet as he opened it barely two inches.

"Liv…I'm coming in." He said as he opened it a little more and poked his head inside. The living room was dark and empty but the bedroom door had a flash of light coming from beneath it.

He walked into the apartment and shut the door behind him and walked over to her door. With a sigh he knocked on the door and waited for a response.

"Olivia….if you don't come out, I'm coming in." He stated.

--

Meanwhile, inside the bathroom Olivia had her face barely above the line of water. Her ears were still immerged in the water, so she figured the bangs on the doors was actually her neighbors having sex. Until she heard a voice that sounded frighteningly close, that sounded like her name.

She pulled herself up out of the water a little bit more so she could hear. She was propped up on her elbows, with her head back listening.

"If you don't come out, I'm coming in."

It was Elliot. She knew he was in her apartment trying to make up for the mess he had made, but couldn't help.

He was far enough away that she wasn't covering herself yet, but then she heard him come into her room and pause by the bathroom door.

"Elliot don't come in here." She stated, alarmed and ashamed.

"Olivia…are you okay?"

"I guess," she stated putting on her tough girl façade and trying to sound like everything was fine and he was being weird.

"I need to see that you're okay. Come out here and talk to me." Elliot stated.

"You're really….the last person I want to talk to right now." Olivia said being sort of truthful. She wanted to talk to him but in the same moment she didn't want to.

"Olivia. I love you." Elliot finally said the words she had been anticipating.

"You don't have to say it, I'm going to be okay." Olivia stated.

"I mean it." Elliot replied, "I couldn't say it on the phone because I was standing in front of Kathy…and she was angry. I didn't want her to think that we were having an affair. I should have just said it…but she knew it was you."

Olivia didn't know what to think of the whole situation. All she knew was that she was sitting in the tub naked…and Elliot was determined to see if she was 'okay'. She wanted more than anything to be stubborn but she was too happy at the fact that he actually loved her to sit in the tub all night long.

She got out…did a rough dry job, then draped the yellow towel around her still moist skin and opened the door to the bathroom.

Elliot walked right in and pulled Olivia into a hard passionate kiss. He wrapped his arms around her and smiled which broke their kiss.

He was completely and utterly content with the fact that the woman he loved for seven years, but hadn't had the courage to say so, was strong enough to tell him herself.

He knew from that moment on that she was his, and was to be only his forever.

* * *

So we can apparently stop it there...but I think I can continue it. Tell me if you guys want it to continue. : )


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